fear of death . lost . pain

Abby. I thought of her as I drove my car towards the car porch just now. It’s a tiring day. Not physically tired but mentally and emotionally. She left us last year but every time I thought of her, she seems so close to my heart.

“Tears couldn’t help rolling down non-stop as I got out of my car parked in the car porch walking towards her. Dad covered her body with gunny sack. I never thought I would lose her so soon. Too soon…”

She is a real good buddy. She’s been by my side all the time since we had her in the family. We had so much fun playing soccer together with mom in the garden. She’s seen me through my ups and downs, shared my laughter and tears. I know that I can always share my heart with her as she’s the forever faithful one. Faithful till her very last moments with the family.

The pain of losing her is so great. So real even till now. I weep as I type.

bored to death

what do you do when you are extremely bored at work place? how i wish i can scream out loud and tell the whole world that i am almost bored to death!

someone from far. who reads me well

david smith. an american who lives long enough in japan. his japanese accent confirms this. a genuine colleague. a good mentor. a fun guy. rich in his sense of humour. an american who looks and behaves more like an asian. crazy for szechuan mapo tohu. a great thinker. a music lover.

thanks to his timely advice in times of need.

ganbaro david!

happiness

happiness in life can be so easy and yet complicated...

i have always wanted to be happy as who i am but it seems next to impossible especially when i am so caught up in the corporate world... i wouldn't say it's impossible but the probability is low, at least for me, it is...

for now, i know, i cannot be happy as who i am... i am loosing myself bit by bit in the busyness of my meaningless daily routine... mind*heart*soul do not seem to be aligned and intacted with each other...

slowing down the pace of life is needed to patch the scattered thoughts in mind, to search the lost soul and to listen to the true little voice in heart...

countable blessings

i learned that blessings can be counted if you wanna count on it... i counted on my blessings received yesterday...

...mommy, pappa, christine, justine, edwin, selsee, jecy, rayson, aunty molly, suchee, elo, adeline, phoebe, rachel, e.laine, sheng, weishin, puifong, winnie, lingling, sansan, chingli, jenny, evelin, amy, clara, clarice, janice, peiming, peishi, soo, gk, angie, cherie, siewmun, charlene, siaoying, robert, andrea, joyce, kate, kailing, wee, ellis, john, rachelann, puichan, sandy, hwan, deborah...

thank you from the bottom of my heart

confession of a shopaholic

it's almost mine! the little floral dress hanging on the metallic garment rack in Zara! after much tossing and turning on my bed... i have decided to own it ^_^

i must confess... the last thing that i can ever resist is no other than a floral dress...

indispensable partner

Familiarity in an unfamiliar place

'indispensable partner'! the theme for the most recent 2009 annual conference held in queenstown. an amazing place that one shouldn't have missed. having thought of the theme again, what i could really think of, is my indispensable partner, the greatest companion, all the time, especially when i am traveling : starbucks's skinny latte (preferably in to-go cup)! i missed the privilege of being able to just leap across the walkway from the hotel where i stayed in penang for a cup of small skinny latte... just before shop closes at 12midnight... the last sip of the hot latte in a cold hotel room completes my day... lights off... and the aroma stays till the next daybreak...